Giving us a shot
by JoTerry
Summary: Renji and Tatsuki have been seeing each other in a rather casual yet complicated relationship, guarding each other's feelings. After a near-death experience in Hueco Mundo, Renji realises that there is something important that he needs to do. This is a side-story to Not to be used loosely.


**Giving us a shot**

 **A oneshot side-story to** ** _Not to be used loosely_**

 **A/N: I do not own Bleach and its characters.**

It was already midnight at the _dojo_ but Tatsuki couldn't sleep. Her last student left two hours ago and she had already locked the front doors. After taking a shower and tossing around in her bed, the _kendo_ master went back downstairs to the _dojo_ , clad in a white baby tee and grey shorts. She picked up a _shinai_ and began training with an imaginary opponent with her eyes closed.

With both hands gripping the bamboo, she made two downward strikes before pretending to push her opponent's weapon with her own. She imagined the other person stumbling back a bit but managed to make quick footwork forward to return a strike at her. She retreated two steps before moving forward, raising her _shinai_ for another downward slash. This time, though, her attack was blocked with another _shinai_. She gasped in surprise and opened her eyes to find Renji's handsome face smirking back at her, a bamboo strip in his hands.

"Renji," she muttered, her voice merely a whisper. Her eyes widened in disbelief, as if she had seen a ghost. Well, technically, he was a ghost. In a _gigai_ , that is. And looking rather hot in red checks and dark jeans.

"Hey," he greeted as he approached her. He was reaching out to touch her cheek when she raised her _shinai_ and gently placed it on his shoulder, promptly stopping him from taking a step closer to her. Taken aback, he lowered his hand while still clutching onto his _shinai_ in the other.

Tatsuki's eyes searched his face for a sign of what his presence meant before she spoke up. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you," he replied.

"Why?" she asked, still holding the same stance.

"I just told you, I wanted to see you. Rukia said…"

"You finally came over because Rukia told you to." It was definitely more of a statement than a question.

Renji grimaced. That was just her bitter assumption but it hurt him all the same to know that she would think he didn't come here on his own accord. "No. She told me that you waited for me."

Tatsuki's tensed shoulders slumped a little but her _shinai_ remained on his shoulder. "So?"

"What do you mean 'so'? _So_ I came over immediately."

The tall, athletic girl continued to stare at the Gotei 13 lieutenant. She didn't mean to sound so accusative. She just wasn't expecting to see him again and she didn't know how to feel at the moment. Was he here to break this up with her? Whatever _this_ was… As fearless as she was personally, the possibility of not ever seeing him again terrified her.

"Suki," he called her. He was the only person in the world who could get away with calling her something girlish like that. Anyone else would've lost their head by now. He slowly pushed her _shinai_ away and took a step closer to her. When she offered no resistance, he dropped his weapon and cupped her shoulders. "I missed you."

Tatsuki's eyes started to glisten but this tomboy had always been known to be able to keep her tears in even during the most emotional moments. "What took you so long?" she asked, biting her dry lip. She was determined not to break down, even in front of this man who was holding her heart.

Renji heaved a sigh as he gently brushed her cheekbone with his knuckle, as if wiping away her invisible tears. "I was scared and… I didn't know if you…" he paused. "I almost didn't make it in Hueco Mundo."

In an attempt to hold back her tears, Tatsuki finally blinked and a couple of drops escaped her eyes. She let go of her _shinai_ and wrapped her arms around the man's waist as she leaned her head on his chest. Renji did not hesitate even for a moment to envelope her toned form into his embrace and rested his chin on top of her head.

"I'm sorry, Ren," she choked. She managed to control any more tears from coming out but her voice betrayed her emotions.

Renji shook his head. "No. I'm the one who should apologise. I shouldn't have made you wait. I should've at least tried to contact you in some way."

Tatsuki loosened her hold on him before leading him to sit on a bench by the wall. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"The trip to hell?" he asked.

"Is there something else?" she half-teased.

Renji chuckled and placed an arm around her shoulders to pull her into his side before pecking her on her forehead. The corner of her lips tilted upwards a bit. She was glad they were back to their usual easy conversation again. "I guess I'll start with how I thought I almost died."

Tatsuki sat up and faced him, giving him all her attention. Renji had always been proud of all his battles, even the ones where he lost to Ichigo and Rukia's brother. But this time, she could see that it affected him even more than the war with Aizen. For the first time, he showed a bit of reluctance in talking about it. _He must've been really afraid_ , she thought.

"The mission was a success but I lost almost all my men in Hueco Mundo. Those that managed to go back with me to Soul Society were critically injured. Two of them died upon arrival. One is still unconscious as we speak. One is so badly traumatised that he left Gotei 13 and went back to live in the Rukongai. The other two who are recovering may or may not be able fight again. I'm the only one still up and it's only because my _bankai_ saved me. There were 200 of us during the incursion," he paused, pinching the bridge of his nose between his eyes. "Only five of us survived," he said quietly.

Tatsuki thought she could hear a trace of mortification in his voice. She slipped her hand into his and gave it a reassuring squeeze. She knew he had some more to say.

Renji brought her hand up briefly to his lips to give it a kiss before continuing, "I spent two weeks in the Fourth Division recovering from broken bones, _cero_ burns and wounds that I thought would never ever close up. My _reiatsu_ is still not back to its normal level even though Unohana- _taichou_ said I'm fit to begin fighting hollows again. I need to train twice as much as before to get back into shape."

The girl chose that moment to chortle a little. "You still look so damn hot."

"You _know_ this is just my _gigai_ ," he smirked, pinching the exposed skin of her thigh. His expression back to being somber, he said, "You don't want to see my Shinigami form, though."

Renji paused as he considered his next action before going with his instinct. Placing his free hand on the side of her face, he leaned down to kiss her lips. It was a very short kiss but it was tender and filled with so much emotions. And when he pulled away from her, the two of them continued to stare into each other's eyes for a moment before he told her what had been bugging him.

"While I was resting, I had a lot of time to think about us. I missed you so much. I thought about how, if I had died right there in Hueco Mundo, how would you ever know what had become of me. I thought about what would happen to you and how you'd feel about us not seeing each other anymore. I thought about how I would not be able to be with you again and it scared the hell out of me because I really want to be with you. One part of me said, 'What the heck? Just go ahead with the relationship and make the most out of whatever time we have together'. While another was in doubt that you would still want to carry on with me, given the risk of losing me to my second death and wasting your life away when you could meet some human dude, get married and have tons of kids."

Tatsuki scoffed. "You think too much, you know that? And you're a guy. You're supposed to leave the thinking to the girl. But I guess that's what happens when you have too much time on your hands."

Renji chuckled. "Well, anyway, I gave in to the 'What the heck' part of me when Rukia told me you spoke to her about us. Suki," he paused, taking in her beauty that was like no other he had seen before. "I want to try and see how far we can go."

Tatsuki nodded with a smile. There was no way she could refuse giving a shot at their relationship.

* * *

 **As indicated above, this is actually a side-story to** ** _Not to be used loosely_** **. Initially, I had this whole thing written in Chapter 13 but then it got too long. The main pairing for** ** _Loosely_** **is IchiRuki, so it didn't seem quite right for me to shift the attention so much to RenTatsu. This one, however, is very independent of the parent fic.**

 **I hope you all enjoyed this. If you haven't read** ** _Loosely_** **, please do. Don't forget to drop a few comments as well. Thanks!**


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